Friday, January 27, 2012

A strange twist of fate

RECENTLY, I read an article that blew me away.

Monique van der Vorst from the Netherlands is a 27-year-old
silver-medal winning Paralympian who had been confined to a wheelchair
for 14 years.

She had been an athletic kid who excelled in tennis and hockey when a
routine ankle operation resulted in nerve damage and left one leg
paralysed from the hip down.

Most people would consider it a terrible tragedy — to lose the use of
a leg because of an accident in the operating room.

It wasn’t reported whether Monique, at 13 years old, mourned the loss
of her leg, but it was clear that after the incident, she took up
handcycling and competed nationally and internationally.

She won six European and three world championship titles, reported The
Sunday Telegraph.

I gaped in horror when I read that in 2008, Monique was hit by a car.
Her spinal cord was damaged and left her completely paralysed from the
waist down.

Anyone would have thought it incredibly tragic and unfair that life
could get so much worse for someone so young and brave.

Yet, later that year, Monique won two silver medals at the Beijing
Paralympic Games.

I was sitting there on the couch, reading this incredible piece of
news and feeling in absolute awe of this woman who is only a year
younger than I am.

Then I got to the part where she got into another accident, in 2010.
She was training on her handcycle when another cyclist hit her hard.

Again, she was back at the hospital.

And what can only be described as a miracle happened — she started
feeling sensations in her legs.

Over the next few days, Monique was able to stand. Within a few
months, she was able to walk.

“After an accident in 2010, my body started to change. After a long
and hard rehab period, I am back on my feet again. For me, a new
competition has started now,” she wrote on her website.

It was reported that Monique has swapped her hand-bike for a regular
model and has started racing competitively.

She told The Sunday Telegraph that she does not expect to be strong
enough to take part in the 2012 Olympics in London, but her goal is to
cycle for the Netherlands in 2016 — as an able-bodied cyclist.

At this point, I could not help but think, “Wow. If it was me, I would
never have been able to overcome such odds with courage and spirit.”

Then I remembered something that my aunt had once said when someone
told her they admired her ability to raise a child on her own while
working and that they couldn’t possibly do it.

“How do you know you won’t be able do it?”

Anger, frustration, tears and despair — these are emotions that many
of us associate with the inability to do something.

Feelings and emotions are part of being human, but they are not what define us.

For example, someone may feel inadequate that he can’t make more
money, but it does not make him an inadequate person.

One may feel frustrated at not being able to walk, but it does not
make you a frustrated person.

The one thing that defines us is our mind. Sometimes, we make the
mistake of thinking that our minds want something when it is our
emotions that shout for it.

When we allow our emotions to take over our minds, we often think of
ourselves as the victim.

When we see ourselves as the victim, it is only natural to helpless.
Instead of trying our best to get out of a despairing situation, we
think that we deserve better.

After trying briefly, we get even more upset that the situation has
not turned around. It’s like saying “Why is life so unfair? It’s not
like I didn’t try!”

I do not think Monique van der Vorst saw herself as a victim when she
was paralysed. And if there ever was a secret to achieving great
things, Monique probably had it down when she wrote on her website:

“If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it,
change your attitude, but don’t complain…”

When we complain about something, it means that our minds have not
found a solution to the problem, or that we have not overcome it.

If we’re complaining about the same thing day after day, it means
we’re dwelling on it. When we are living in the past, we are not
taking full advantage of the present.

I do not think for a moment that it was easy for Monique to overcome
her emotions and strive to achieve what most would consider
impossible.

I am sure she had moments where she felt like quitting. I am sure
there were times where she gave in to her emotions and wept at the
pain and unfairness of it all.

If you are climbing a steep and treacherous hill, there will be
moments where your shoes will get caught in rocks and you’ll stumble.
Moments where you feel so tired you have to stop and catch your
breath.

If you are with a group of people climbing this hill, you will see
some turning back the way they came, thinking that there is no way
they would be able to get to the top.

You will see some simply stopping, happy that they have managed to
climb this far but do not feel like they need to go further.

Some will rest for a while and trudge on. They will fall and get up.
When it rains, they climb slower or wait out the storm before heading
upwards.

All three kinds of people are like you and me, normal human beings who
make our own choices in life.

When it comes right down to it, it matters little how good your shoes
and climbing equipment are, and sometimes, even how experienced a hill
climber you are, because the power of the mind overrides any physical
and emotional challenge or pain.

People who achieve the unbelievable have incredibly strong minds,
which they train and exercise constantly.

If we do not allow our emotions and ego to control our mind, we are
never paralysed. We will never be the victim; nor will we be helpless.

Towards the end of the article I was reading, Monique said in the interview:

“Do I believe this is a miracle? I don’t know. I do believe there is something.”

“But I don’t believe you can sit back and wait for miracles. You have
to believe in yourself.”


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